Tuesday, December 2, 2008

The SARDIES Nominations Are In!

As founder of this here blog, I am picking the winners - Mr. Leonard Belka.

Winners in RED. "Congrats to all and to all a congrats...." (Mr. Belka drunk speech - circa 1975)

It was July of this year when the Sardonic News Conglomerate made its inaugural post. Although it hasn't been a full year, the staff at the SNC has compiled nominations in several categories for the 2008 SARDIES!

(Nominations are for items mentioned within the confines of this blog)
More, possibly, to follow:

"THE DALEY" (FuckStick of the Year)

David Wygant
Glenn Beck
Jay Marriotti

"THE GAZPACHO" (MOST AWFUL IDEA):

Dating coaches
New Orleans Dead Body Cover Up (Cynthia McKinney)
Fake Bigfoot Press Conference
Fidelity Contracts

"The BLAGO" (STUPIDEST DIPSHIT):

Cynthia McKinney
The guys who took David Wygant's dating seminars
Jay Marriotti
Blago - the Guv

"SOCIETY FOR PUTTING THINGS ON TOP OF OTHER THINGS" AWARD (a.k.a. Biggest Bullshit Job Description)

David Wygant - Dating Coach
Brad Berens - Chief content officer for iMedia Communications, who analyzes how media advances change people's behavior.
Marian Salzman - a futurist and trendspotter
Leon James - University of Hawaii professor and expert in the psychology of driving
Dr. Gilda - Relationship Expert

"THE ULTIMATE SARDY AWARD" (a.k.a. I wanted to punch something in the nuts after reading this story....award)

http://sardonicnews.blogspot.com/2008/11/its-been-awhile-since-weve-checked-in.html

http://sardonicnews.blogspot.com/2008/10/men-are-to-blame-forsarah-palin.html

http://sardonicnews.blogspot.com/2008/08/i-hate-him-i-hate-him-i-hate-him.html

http://sardonicnews.blogspot.com/2008/08/mike-wallace-it-aint.html

http://sardonicnews.blogspot.com/2008/11/2032s-jeffrey-steingarten.html

http://sardonicnews.blogspot.com/2008/11/barack-you-complete-me.html

"The Hannity" -(Most Condescending Remark and/or Quote)

From Nov. 13th, "Barack, You Complete Me...":

Psychologist Lester Lefton - "Americans are among the most resilient people on this planet," he says. "We will all be fine. You too, Republicans. For those Americans whose candidate did not prevail, time is your best friend. Eventually you will adjust and recognize the country is not falling apart simply because the 'other' candidate is in office. And soon these proud Americans will begin to refocus their energies."

From Inaugural Post:

Eve Pidgeon - Superparent: "It was nothing for our mothers to send us away for two months. We were their jobs 24 hours a day, so perhaps they needed a respite," Pidgeon says. "They perhaps didn't ache for their kids on a daily basis, as working parents do."

Excerpt from Susan Dominus, Nov. 17th entry:

"....David Fishman, an Upper West Sider who turned 12 last month, decided to take himself out for dinner one night last week. His parents had called him at home to say they were running late, suggesting that he grab some takeout at the usual hummus place. Hummus, again? David thought he could do better than that..."

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

One note: Mariotti beat out the Guv at an award named "The Blago". Deserving, indeed.

snrub

Christo P. Ney said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Christo P. Ney said...

Fine and good picks, all!

These are the true winners in the world.