Monday, August 11, 2008

Obama, McCain charging for yard signs
08:28 AM CDT on Monday, August 11, 2008
By GROMER JEFFERS JR. / The Dallas Morning News

Want a yard sign expressing your support for Barack Obama or John McCain? (Damn! I live in an aparment!) Be prepared to pay for it.
Campaign yard signs have traditionally been free, but when Lake Highlands resident Mike Norris contacted the local Obama headquarters about picking one up, they told him to bring cash. (Unmarked and in a clear, plastic bag. And no funny stuff or the cat gets it!)
The $5 price was $3 cheaper than the signs Mr. Obama hawks online, (bargain!) but Mr. Norris, 59, felt he shouldn't have to pay anything. (Cheap skate)
"It seems to me they're putting up a barrier," he said. "What will they do next? If I go there and ask to volunteer, will they make me pay to work for them? It just doesn't seem right."
Yard signs have morphed from being a simple display of support to an intricate system of raising money and building an online donor base. (Nothing slimey about that. Come on! Get with the times, fuddy-duds!)
When supporters of Mr. Obama and Mr. McCain buy signs or other campaign gear, they also turn over personal information that will be used by the campaigns over and over again. (Kinda like The campaigns even report the purchase of yard signs as political contributions to highlight their grass-roots support. (In court this would be called "lying" or "cooking the books")
"In the future you're going to see a lot of people charged, not because ... [the campaigns] want the money, but because it gets you into their database," said former Texas Land Commissioner Garry Mauro, who led Hillary Rodham Clinton's presidential campaign in Texas. "If somebody gives you $5 or $10 for a bumper sticker, they will give you $5 or $10 later on. That's the real reason to do it." (My grandma had a Hillary sign in her yard. She hasn't spent 5 bucks on anything ever. Good luck with that theory.)
Texans may also have a hard time getting yard signs because the state is not considered a campaign battleground. (No! The hell you say!) Mr. McCain is expected to win Texas, but he doesn't have an office in Dallas. (Nice touch) Mr. Obama maintains a Dallas office that's open only on Wednesdays. (Nothing half assed about that!)
Supporters in states like Missouri, Ohio and Florida are more likely to get free yard signs than Texans are. (Reason number 6,098 that living in Texas is for chumps)
"The local parties are bringing in signs and get reimbursed or losing money in the long run," Mr. Mauro said. "As the election gets closer and closer and people start expending national resources, you'll be able to get free signs again." (Can't.. fucking.. wait)
Local parties, which have been deluged with phone calls about yard signs, plan to pick up the slack. (Deluged? I find this hard to believe)
Dallas County Democrats, for instance, plan to offer two kinds of Obama yards signs for $5 each. They are printing their own Obama signs and have an online contest in which residents can vote for one of two designs. ( frosting on a turd.)
County Democratic Chairwoman Darlene Ewing understands the frustration of people who don't want to pay. (That's big of ya)
"The first time I had to pay for one, I said, 'Are you kidding me? I have to pay to put your sign in my yard?' " she said. (Thanks for the minutes of the meeting)
But many people are willing to pay, perhaps because the historic campaign could make the signs valuable keepsakes. County Democrats sold signs to 450 people in the first two hours they announced plans to offer Obama displays. (I'm beginning to understand why Ponzi schemes work)
Ms. Ewing said the Obama campaign would give a certain number of free signs to each state. But she figured that will amount to only 10 complimentary signs for Dallas County. (10? Gee, thanks for the socks ,Uncle Barack)
Mr. Obama's campaign wouldn't say whether it will give away a bundle of signs but pledged to help Texas Democrats.
"We are focusing our resources on creating operations in all 50 states to help Democrats up and down ballot win in November," said spokeswoman Shannon Gilson. (ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ)
Local Republicans hope to have McCain yard signs available by early September.
"My inclination at this point is to give them away for free because we want to give people the opportunity to participate," said County Chairman Jonathan Neerman. (While there's no undo cause for alarm there's certainly no room for complacency...)
"There are people who are turned off at having to buy yard signs on a Web site," (Gee ya think?)he said. "I talked to a guy today who was complaining because he bought three yards signs online and because they have that plastic material, every time the wind picks up the signs blow away. And that's before the vandals get to them." (Gonna have to call Sheriff Taylor)
Meanwhile, Mr. Norris, the Obama supporter, says he's no longer interested in getting a yard sign.
"I won't buy one," he said. "No wonder the campaigns are flushed with cash."
(Or morons)

No comments: